Cry Baby Mom Day

I’m kind of an emotional mom today. I don’t write about this kind of stuff super often, I usually try to keep my mommy/wifey life and my writing life a bit separated. But for those of you who follow my stuff a bit more regularly, you might recall my mentioning a time or two the struggles I had having babies Transforming Personal Trauma and Devastation into Drive and a Sheer Will to Succeed. AND Our bodies remember trauma, even if our brains fail to register.

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Anyhow, I’m not sure if it’s because it was so hard for me to have kids… or if it’s really just an every mom thing… but sometimes the milestones really take a toll on me. Today is one of those days! Perhaps it’s even the fact that I’ve had a hysterectomy and will never have more kids, each milestone is a one time thing and then it’s gone. Forever locked away in the memory bank, only be visited on the occasion where some random situation calls for it.  I’ve found myself really wallowing today in that whole, ‘where did the time go’, frame of mind!

You see, it’s my son’s sixth birthday. *wipes tear* This year, he’ll be going to ALL DAY school for the first time ever. He’ll also be learning to read, and I’m going to have to let him ride on busses all by himself. Then to top things off, my daughter is going to preschool this year too!! I don’t know what I’m going to do for them first couple of weeks aside from bawl my eyes out and hide in my room, slamming shit around and refusing to shop or shower or function at all really. I’m sure the extra time alone will be helpful (eventually), especially with my writing. For now, I think I’ll just cry!

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So how about it, Moms (and Dads, and Grandparents, and Caretakers alike)… Now that school is almost back into full swing, are any of you struggling emotionally as bad as I am? Perhaps I’m just an emotional quack today, and it’ll pass! …. But I doubt it!

25 Comments Add yours

  1. raistlin0903 says:

    I don’t have kids (unfortunately) but I do know how hard it can be for parents to see them leaving. You are not being an emotional quack…at all. It only tells one very important message the way that you are feeling: And that is how much love you have for your kids. It’s pretty much the only reason why you are feeling this way. If you didn’t care about your kids, it would not bother you at all. Take strength from that! Sure it will be hard, but you know what? You will only cherish the moments you will have with your children so much more. Eventually the feeling will pass, and you will have some beautiful memories to look back to as well. And remember this: the love for your children will never fade away, it will only grow stronger. For now though, go grab that box of tissues and cry. I will probably make you feel better. And then just think back on all the things you have done for your kids, and all the moments you have already shared with them. A post like this only proves how great a mother you truly are 😊

    Liked by 2 people

    1. OMG this is EXACTLY everything I needed to hear. It’s so important to hang onto each and every milestone, and even little moments. I see parents all the time who just blow these things off like its nothing. Makes me so upset, like those kids need LOVE! Come on moms! Mikel I have total faith that you’ll have the most adorable little ones someday! XOXO

      Liked by 1 person

      1. raistlin0903 says:

        Aww, thanks so much for your kindness. As I am nearing the age of 43 I unfortunately don’t have that faith anymore, but it’s okay.
        But you are right, time goes by way too fast,which is exactly why it’s so important to keep hanging on and cherising the precious little moments that you have. Before you know it, you might miss them.
        Off topic….Please would you stop being such a good writer? I have (finally) started reading Aggravated Momentum. I absolutely LOVE it. I started with it yesterday and have already read more than a 100 pages. The only reason I haven’t read more yet, is a big project this month that takes up a lot of time. But wow…my only regret is not having started on this sooner. It’s an amazing read, and a real pageturner 😊😊

        Liked by 1 person

      2. AWW I’m so glad you’re reading AM!!! I can’t wait to see what you think of the whole thing. I’m honored that you’re reading my stuff! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Fingers To Sky says:

    I was there last year, my oldest went to full time school, leaving me home with my two girls. I didn’t sleep the night before he started school. Seeing him get in the bus was both exciting and heart wrenching. Things seemed to have sped up now that he is in school. I have 2 more years until the next one goes full time.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. UGH, doesn’t it suck! All of my friends are telling me how excited they are, and how wonderful the extra time is, and how quiet it is. I’m just heartbroken to let him go all day. Good luck with your second one! I’m glad I’m not alone in this!

      Like

  3. booksofb says:

    I can remember those days – very bittersweet. As an empty nester, however, I can tell you that the day eventually comes, if you’re lucky, when you’re happy to see them go – knowing they’ll be back from time to time because they want to – not because they have to – and you’re just proud of all they’ve done and accomplished. Cheers, Brian

    Like

  4. I feel like children going to “all day” school is hard on a lot of mothers! Not having children, I can’t attest to this, but I can understand it being a challenging time!
    It has to be tough realizing that you won’t be going through this again in the future… But, on the plus side, when’s he hits those nasty teenage years you’ll probably be saying “thank God I won’t have to go through this again!!” 😉😅… Always a silver lining? 😆

    Liked by 1 person

    1. HAHA you’re so right! I’m dreading the teen years, so I totally have that lining to look forward to!! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Bindu says:

    Worry not. Some of us have been there and done that and understand what you mean. Trust me, you will sooo miss these very times, few years down the line, that you are fretting about currently. Ask a lonely mom!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh I don’t doubt that for a moment! I hope you get to see your kidoes often… and maybe grandkids too?

      Like

      1. Bindu says:

        Thanks Didi. My son is in the college. Graduation. Not yet time for grandkids.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Well hopefully he takes his time then, for sure! Get that career in order! 🙂 Best of luck to you AND to him 🙂

        Like

      3. Bindu says:

        Thanks so much for your good wishes. God bless you all.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. My son just turned 1 and as a stay at home Mom with no family around, I sometimes find myself wishing for a break. Thank you for reminding me to cherish every moment because before I know it, he’ll be starting his first day of school!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. YES! Hang on to him tightly and cherish even the frustrating times! Good luck mama

      Like

  7. Bunsukh.com says:

    Great article ..!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I am sure I will be the same way when my daughter gets to school age… but for now I am not even going to think about it! Lol! I know you are definitely not alone in those feelings, I think it is definitely a mom thing. Stay strong mama, you got this!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Treasure every minute. Its definitely hard! 😊😍😭

      Like

  9. I will keep you in prayer dear and I plead the blood of Jesus Christ over you and yours at this time. I went through these issues 3 times. ( I have 4 kids but my last son I am now homeschooling.) It can be a very difficult thing and I am very close to my kids so it was super hard. Just pray and keep busy throughout the day and each one will get more easier than the last.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! Even now that it’s been a few weeks, it’s still hard!! Thank you so much for the prayers and encouragement! I’m sending all the same back your way. Best of luck with the home schooling too, that has got to be a challenge all in it’s own ❤

      Liked by 1 person

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